Woman Refuses To Eat At Her Birthday Dinner Because Restaurant Is Too Expensive

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abbyadler
Dec 3, 2021 2:00 PM EST

We're the type of women who go all out for our birthdays. If our family and friends aren't showering us in love and presents, then we don't want it. That's why we were so surprised when we read today's 'Am I The A$$hole?' post. OP shared how uncomfortable she felt when her S/O and family treated her to an expensive restaurant for her birthday. Apparently, they already knew that she doesn't like to spend money or have too much money spent on her, but they went ahead with the plans anyway. As a result, she ended up not ordering anything while the rest of her family enjoyed the food. We get that she felt uncomfortable, but she should have at least ordered something small instead of making a statement by not ordering anything. Scroll down for the full story. 

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  • 01
    Font - AITA for refusing to eat at a very expensive restaurant on my birthday? I want to apologize for any typos I'm on my phone. So I (F24) had a birthday today and my whole family went to celebrate. My partner (M28) planned the whole thing and didn't want to tell me. He wanted it to be a surprise. I have never liked surprises. I think he knows as much. My father also planned some of it, so he wasn't in the dark about it.
    via u/The_bees_beans

    If anyone wants to spend money on us, we're definitely not going to object. 

  • 02
    Font - Anyway, so the day starts out by driving 2 hours to go ice skating. Also a surprise but one I was receptive of. I love ice skating. We then go to dinner which I was unaware of where we were going to. We get there and I quickly realize that this was a very expensive restaurant and something I wasn't comfortable with. I hate spending money and people spending money on me.
    via u/The_bees_beans

    Girl, just accept the gifts the fam is bestowing upon you. We seriously don't get it. 

  • 03
    Font - My father asked what I was going to order. I said nothing. Instant looks for my family, already knowing what's up. I typically don't like to eat so this isn't a shocker. They think I'm almost joking though, so nothing happens. The time to order comes around. I order nothing. My mother asks me if I'd rather leave. Drinks have been placed and everyone else has
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 04
    Font - ordered. I refused since we already placed orders. We stay. I think they believed I would be eating off their plates. I didn't. The dinner lasted nearly three hours and I didn't eat a thing. Not even the dessert they brought out for me since it was my birthday. I was invested in not eating. Which might make me TAH. The diner cost $900 which is far too much for that. I hated it. I hate money being spent like that.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 05
    Font - Now, they know I hate spending money on food and money spent on me. Just this July we went out to a pricy place (not nearly as much as that) and I didn't order anything. We then had a conversation about it and how it makes me uncomfortable spending that much money on food. We had also went to an amusement park that summer and I didn't eat anything I didn't purchase. The food is far too expensive and if my family chips in to buy me food I just feel gross about it. They know this much about
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 06
    Font - My father and husband have expressed how they really wanted to go to this particular restaurant in the past. I said I didn't find the need to and didn't care about it that much. That was months ago. They also say how it's sad that I never want to go places. Ever. I'm an introvert at heart. My husband complains that I never want to do anything with him. So they know I hate leaving the house.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 07
    Font - I'm going to have a conversation about it when we get home and explain my feelings. I felt like my birthday was completely ruined. My husband I can tell is upset that I didn't eat. And I think he'll place the blame on me. And I don't want to make my father sad. So it's a tough situation.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 08
    Font - AITA for refusing to eat a meal that would have cost over 1k if I had ordered food?
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 09
    Font - We live with my parents. We just had a baby who is less than a year old. We have talked about moving out and I'd love to. But we can't afford it. I think it's ridiculous that he spent this much on a meal when we need to save up.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 10
    Smile - Also, I have had issues in the past with eating. PTSD led to starving myself and loosing a lot of weight. I was unhealthy and I'm trying to get better.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 11
    Font - I've seen therapists before. One asked if she thought I'd go to hell if I killed myself which is what she believed. That's hard for me to get over.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 12
    Font - Also, the evening was not ruined for my parents or family. I spoke to them after and they had a good time. Excluding the frustration my husband had.
    via u/The_bees_beans
  • 13
    Font - SucculentEmpress · 8h Partassipant [2] YTA. You ruined your own birthday on purpose.
    via u/SucculentEmpress
  • 14
    Font - Minimum_Reference_73 · 8h Partassipant [1] ESH, they shouldn't have surprised you with something they knew you wouldn't like, but you also need to examine how your negativity affects those around you since you seem to be a wet blanket on a lot of things they'd like to do.
    via u/Minimum_Reference_73

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aita drama birthday family birthday cake
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